If there were an audio version of this and I was to offer advice to other MIDDLE-AGED men in contrast to your story I would say this…..

Listen to the entire story every morning while doing sit ups. Because her doom and gloom applies to lazy fat loafs.

Being in shape is a choice. Women seem to dig guys with shaved heads and I bet you have a lot more money now than you did when you were younger. You are also smarter.

Chicks dig confidence and although Misty isn’t a fan, as long as your dating profile on Match has a picture of your still serviceable crank at full mast and a recent bank statement, the world is in fact… your oyster.