NFL KICKOFF SPECIAL!!!!!!!!! Which NFL Owner/Oligarch is The Biggest A-HOLE?
Part 1 DAN SNYDER REDSKINS/FOOTBALL TEAM/COMMANDERS
It’s fall and time to burn your hot dogs, cover your chips in cheese, and pop a fresh Bud Light becasue the NFL is about to kick off.
Who could have predicted last year and a heck of an offseason?
Ram’s beat the Bungles in the Super Bowl
Roger Goddell has his henchman go after a coach for calling him a “pussy”
A fired coach calls out an owner for asking him to tank games to get a better draft pick
Another owner avoids Congressional Suppena’s by hiding on his yacht and praying the GOP takes back the house
Walmart buys the Denver Bronco’s
and
Future Hall of Fame QB and generally smarmy guy Aaron Rodgers tells the world that hallucinogenics have made him more mellow and helped his focus
The excitement for 2022 is at an all-time high. What can we look forward to this year? Well, if you are a real fan of the NFL, you are looking for turmoil as the mega-rich owners act like the HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS trying to screw each other over and stab each other in the back.
All of this as they scratch and claw to prove that they are the best rich guy in America…….. at hiring someone else to build a football team.
Medium isn't exactly the sports page but I wanted to do something thematic that maybe would appeal to this audience, so I give you…
LORD DUKES GUIDE TO THE NFL OWNERS, PART 1.
DAN SNYDER REDSKINS/FOOTBALL TEAM/COMMANDERS
The oligarchs that own these teams are generally awful people. Most are (as defined by the dictionary) racists, misogynists, and lecherous. But among this group, a few men stand out as the biggest pieces of shit. In the coming weeks I’ll outline them one by one. And today I’ll start with…..
Dan Snyder
Dan is a self-made man. He helped his sister after she started a company that put ads up in Dr’s offices. Then acquired more and more media (ad sales) companies until they went public and VIOLA, he was rich.
He bought the Washington Redakins in 1999. A storied franchise with a really racists name.
He then proceeded to play Fantasy Football with his team and throw money at coaches and free agents like an 8 year old who wants his blanket back and expects everyone to serve his wants. But like most douchbags who try to micromanage an NFL team, he was terrible at it. And they lost — a lot.
Then controversy struct.
From Wikipedia
Since his purchase of the team in 1999, Snyder was repeatedly pressured to change the team’s name by numerous fans, politicians, and advocacy groups because redskin is a derogatory term for Native Americans. In May 2013, in response to a question regarding the teams’ Federal Trademark, Snyder told the USA Today “We’ll never change the name. It’s that simple. NEVER — you can use caps.”[32] Snyder refused to meet with Native American advocates for a name change. A pitched public relations battle in 2013 and 2014 led Snyder to employ crisis management and PR firms in an effort to defend the name. Snyder’s creation of the Washington Redskins Original Americans Foundation in 2014 was seen as a “cheap effort to buy favor from Indian communities” by activists.
As someone of the Jewish faith, he understood the pain this type of slur can cause someone as we’ll learn later as he sues someone for being anti-Semitic. However, he’s not American Indian so he really didn’t give a fuck.
Although an unusually petulant person, he clearly had a soft spot for his racist team’s mascot.
In 2020 a letter was sent asking league and team sponsors to stop supporting them until they changed the name. PepsiCo, and Nike among others agreed and in July 2020 they announced they were retiring the name and replacing it with….Something eventually.
Snyder was such a chap-assed little bitch he refused to come up with a new name for the next two seasons and instead allowed the team to be called THE WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM.
Gotta hand it to him, the man can market.
We’ll come back to the name in a minute, but first, let's discuss every rich guy’s favorite pass time — suing people!
All rich guys like to sue people, but Dan’s skin is unusually thin. He is also a massive dick who really didnt give a fuck about anyone or anything.
For instance…
He leaked the name of a Park Ranger who investigated his illegal clear-cutting of 100-year-old trees to increase his property value .5%. Not 5%, .5%.
He ruined the guy’s life and Snyder was fined a whopping $100/day and sued by his neighbors. That’ll teach him!
IN 2011 he tried to get a writer from a local paper fired for writing an article entitled “The Cranky Redskins Fan’s Guide to Dan Snyder”. He sued the paper calling the artwork (Snyder with devil horns) “antisemitic”.
I was personally unaware that satan was a jew, but he got traction.
The Otherside of suing people is his being sued. And if you don’t give a fuck about your fellow man, you probably aren’t a solid citizen when it comes to the ladies either.
WIKIPEDIA
in July 2020, The Washington Post published a series of articles alleging that over 40 women who were former employees of the organization, including office workers and cheerleaders, had been sexually harassed and discriminated against by Snyder and other male executives, colleagues, and players of the team since at least 2006. That December, it was also reported that Snyder had settled a sexual harassment claim with a former female employee for a sum of $1.6 million. The alleged incident had occurred on his private plane while returning from the Academy of Country Music Awards in 2009. Two private investigations at the time, by the team and an outside law firm, failed to substantiate the woman’s claim, with it being reported that Snyder paid the sum to avoid any negative publicity.
I’m sorry, $1.6million to avoid “negative publicity”?
For context, a public university in California paid a student $96,000. because a faculty member pressed her to drink whisky with him and told her she should masturbate to “relax” and “report her progress back to him”.
So the mind wonders…. What did he do to her on that plane that would be 16X worse than that? Reports from those who have spent time with Snyder are mixed, but his action would infer he is more or less an asshole. Maybe a 3-hour private flight with him is just 16x worse than what the young woman in CA had to endure. Or maybe he did something darker? Or perhaps he’s a victim… lol
Park Avenue (NFL home offices) took notice of the situation the Washington Post reported on. They hired an “independent” outside lawyer, Beth Wilkenson, to compile a report on the workplace culture of the then Washington Football Team.
It’s with great intent the NFL added the word “independent” to the press releases. Of course, if I hire a gardener and tell him to “do what you want in the yard, you have complete autonomy”, and I walk up to him a day later and say, “but no Palm Trees”, he’s not really “independent” now is he?
Let me just say this, the NFL does not like Palm Trees.
After allowing roughly a year to pass (thus killing its story value) Wilkenson ended her “independent investigation”.
FROM WIKIPEDIA
It found that incidents of sexual harassment, bullying, and intimidation were commonplace throughout the organization under his ownership. The NFL fined the team $10 million in response, with Snyder also voluntarily stepping down from running the team’s day-to-day operations for a few months, giving those responsibilities to his wife Tanya.
The report was not published and they announced all this the Friday before the July 4th weekend. They call that a “news dump” in the world of news.
Aside from bad workplace culture, Dan has had another problem in the last year. During the economic downturn of the early 2000s, Dan started keeping a 2nd set of books. (allegedly)
In March 2021, reports surfaced that Snyder intentionally under-reported ticket sales to the NFL and IRS in order to pay a smaller share into the NFL’s Visiting Team Fund, allowing him to keep more of the ticket revenue than he otherwise would.
The visitor’s fund is the pool of money a visiting team gets when they play another team at the team’s home stadium. Because the NFL is all about shared revenue, 40% of all ticket sales go into a general fund called the “visitors fund”. That is then returned to the teams as road game compensation to cover costs, whatever.
If you lied about how much you grossed in ticket sales you would be literally cheating your business partners.
Early in 2022, a whistleblower informed the league that Snyder was in fact, keeping two sets of books and skimming from the visitor’s fund. Every story I’ve read on the matter says the same thing, “The NFL declined to comment”.
Congress (cuz they have nothing else to do I guess) took an interest and wanted to chat with Snyder.
But Snyder had plans already. Snyder wasn’t available, as he was on his yacht in the Mediterranean sea. His vacation was expected go be until Nov when friendly GOP congressional hopefuls took office and pushed this to the side.
Of course, Dan is a public figure and with that, people started paying attention to his shenanigans. Including a Twitter account set up to track Snyder’s Yacht.
From PROFOOTBALLTALK.COM
A new Twitter account tracks Snyder’s massive boat the Lady S, wherever it may be. The account also eyeballs Snyder’s private jets. The information is all based on public-available data, and it was started by a fan of the team (and not a fan of Snyder) who was at home with COVID and had nothing to do.
Had Trump not kept Top Secret Documents in his sock drawer, inflation not subsided and the supreme court not gone all in on a Christian version of Sharia Law, he may still be there. However, the winds changed and Snyder testified behind closed doors recently.
Back to the WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM.
After two years of being a giant baby, he agreed to name his team. The name they came up with, THE WASHINGTON COMMANDERS.
I suppose it’s subjective, but to be honest, I’d prefer they stayed THE WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM.
